

Similarly, said Damour, “you should see as an extraordinary weight training program for your mind. When she talks with teenage girls, she uses the metaphor of exercise: To develop physical strength, you have to slowly push your levels of physical endurance, building up strength through resistance training. The anxiety that comes with stretching to face these and other challenges is part of how humans develop strength, said Damour. Teenagers' lives are filled with change: Their bodies and brains are transforming, they usually switch schools at least once between grades 5 and 12, their academic workload is increasing, and social relationships are constantly evolving. Adults can make a difference simply by “reassuring them that, a great deal of time, stress is just operating as a friend and ally to them.”Ĭhange and stress go hand in hand - even if a change is positive. “The upshot of that is that we have adults and young people who are stressed about being stressed and anxious about being anxious.”Īnxiety is a normal and healthy function, according to Damour, and much of the anxiety that teenagers express is a sign that they are aware of their surroundings, mindful of their growing responsibilities, and frightened of things that are, in fact, scary. “Somehow a misunderstanding has grown up about stress and anxiety where our culture now sees both as pathological,” said Damour. In recent years, she has noticed a change in how society views stress. And if those levels become untenable, there are tested strategies for reining anxiety back in.ĭamour, a psychologist and author of the new book "Under Pressure: Confronting the Epidemic of Stress and Anxiety in Girls," has spent decades working with adolescent girls and their families. Lisa Damour has hopeful news for parents and teens: first, some degree of stress and anxiety is not only normal but essential for human growth. Researchers and psychologists posit several hypotheses about why these rates are on the rise - from digital hyperconnectivity to heightened external pressures to simply a greater awareness, and therefore diagnosis, of mental health concerns.

You can bring discussions to closure and regain control of your time by using the reframe approach.In the last decade, rates of anxiety-related disorders in teenagers have steadily risen, particularly in girls. "Let's make a point to do lunch really soon, okay?" Politely, I reframed from breezy conversation to end the call.

"I have to jump on another call in four minutes. "Oh, goodness, Kourtney, time flies when we get a chance "to catch up. I glanced at my phone and realized I had to be on my next conference call in four minutes. I was on the phone with a client, and we'd finished up business and had been just catching up for several minutes. Something as simple as, "Let's take a look "and see what's going on "and see if we can get you some answers." Reframing is an ideal strategy when your customer is upset and venting, but it's also great when your customer is friendly and chatty, but you need to wrap up the conversation. And lastly, reframe the conversation with an intentional response that moves your customer out of storytelling and into resolution. "I can see your point," or "I realize this has been frustrating," are good examples of recognizing the customer's emotion. Second, when they pause, say something to recognize the customer's frustration. Don't interrupt because this will add to the customer's frustration. First, allow the customer to explain the issue. To reframe a conversation with a customer, you'll do three things. Reframing is a tool you can use to shift the conversation when your customer is stuck blowing off steam about a problem they've experienced. What my friend did is reframed my thinking to get me to focus on what could go right. My friend looked at me with wise eyes and said, "You could look at it this way, "your dad has an 85% chance at life." I smiled, nodding, knowing she was right.

There was a 15% risk of death with my dad's procedure. When my dad was preparing to have a quadruple bypass and heart valve replacement, I confided to a friend how anxious I was about the surgery.
